Posts Tagged ‘fat cats are happy cats’

Shake Your Money Maker (modestly, wearing a loose-fitting turtleneck)

Friends, I’m on fire. I’ve just returned from a weekend seminar entitled “Discovering Your Financial Blessing; God takes care of the Christian Sparrows First”.  And let me tell you, I’ve never been more encouraged!  I can’t wait to share with my readers.

The seminar was being held in Southern Oregon, so Cat and I packed up the Hummer and headed north. We fired up the Stryper playlist on our brand new iPod Nano, and arrived a few hours later.

Friends, let me tell you!   The facilities were beautiful. The Oregonian National Tea Party for Patriots has some land on a hazelnut farm  that they generously allowed for our time together for a very small fee and promise of false residency in order to vote in the upcoming local elections.  Gorgeous! What a place for fellowship, food and fun.

We were there for teaching, so the women stayed in one cabin, the men in another. Now at first, Cat and I had some problems with this arrangement as a happily married couple for over 20 years, we’d not slept apart too much, I don’t allow that.   But as the weekend went on, this time with the men where we could really process the teaching we were receiving in-depth in order to edify both one another and our households turned into a blessing. The separation also gave the women plenty of opportunity to talk amongst themselves, sharing ideas of how to create a business from the home. At some point, I’ll consider allowing my bride to be a guest blogger here, she’s got an awful lot of ideas on how to be a proper help-mate.

Let me now offer the three things the Lord has impressed upon me and has asked me to teach all of you regarding what you need to understand about money.

1.  Your taxes aren’t part of the Kingdom of God.
You know what the Word says about taxes – more importantly, tax collectors. Folks, taxes just aren’t spiritual funds. Taxes are nothing more than this government playing Robin Hood – an atheist one at that! What’s important about your taxes is finding loopholes out of paying them. Fight them with all the passion in your being because this secular government is going to take your money that you work for and apply it to programs and public schools that have nothing to do with you, your family or restoring the values of this nation.

The Bible says that taxes are evil – when Jesus went to the Jerusalem Chamber of Commerce at that time and turned those tables over yelling “Why do you pollute my Father’s house?” He was making a statement against taxes and those who collect them. The Prince of Darkness rules this world and taxes are his Ninja stars. Fight against this evil by fighting all programs that do not directly benefit your children, children that have been promised wealth, health and prosperity. Continue to tithe and make sure that all of this funding goes to sending your children to christian camp.

2. If you are following the Lord, the wealth is sure to follow.
Some of Team Jesus have been through a trying financial season the last few years. Many have lost their jobs due to the current administration’s bungling of this economy.  Many of our God-given investment portfolios have been compromised due to our investments in banks and oil being corrupted by those who continue to disrespect and defame the good men and women within these corporations who are fighting to preserve the backbone of  this nation – the center of the world.

Thankfully, companies like Walmart are here to assist with lowered prices and cheerful greeters, reminding us of the importance of putting a positive face on this difficult time.  As for me, I appreciate these fine men and women who are often retired and have decided to head back to work in these valuable positions with a smile on their face.  Sure, they may have lost their small hardware business when Walmart moved in to town or their entire retirement was wiped out due to the blip in the real estate market a couple of years back, but they are in their golden years. Remaining active is important.

But what you need to know is that the problem may not be financial – it more than likely finds its roots in the spiritual. We are promised wealth, wealth of all kinds. Financial being just one. When one is wealthy friends, it’s a sign of obedience. That’s why in my next book, I devote an entire chapter to being cautious when interacting with the poor. God calls us in his Word to be “equally yoked”.

What do I mean by equally yoked? I’m glad to clarify, as many take this verse to mean something about marrying non-believers. It is actually fine to marry a non-Christian if they meet a certain standard of wealth.  No, this verse is encouraging us to be wise to not associate with anyone who happens to be beneath us in terms of wealth and property accumulation. Of course we are to love the poor, I’m certainly going to allow a fellow brother or sister to drive me to the Dairy Queen in their ’98 Ford Fiesta. It is made in America and there are times when a man just needs a Blizzard. But it’s also an opportunity for me to help get this believer on the straight and narrow again. By the time we’re through the drive through, the goal is that we’ve both hit bottom. He his pride and dignity, and me? Well, hopefully I’ve struck Oreo.

3. When atheists challenge us on our wealth, they are just jealous that we are more special to God than they are.
Friends, atheists have very peculiar views on Jesus. Some even claim to have studied Him, even admire Him. We all know this is simply a tactic to woo you in and then destroy you and your family. Stand up against this foolishness.  We all know that injecting things like poor people into conversations about money are inappropriate and manipulative (except of course when we put pictures of kids we’re saving in Africa on our fund-raising calendars).

One popular argument atheists offer to counter Christians and all the good we’re doing in the world is how little we acknowledge the role of money in our lives. But how can we? Our energy is as it should be, devoted to raising wholesome kids and fighting the moral battle against the gays. So what if our pastor drives a new BMW, there’s nothing wrong with this. Prosperity is a sign that God loves us. He assures us in His Word that He takes care of the sparrows who are called according to His purpose, that he saves them first and throws all of the other birds into a lake of fire. Now I’ve gotten some mail that suggests I may get a few verses mixed up or the Greek is the Hebrew, but I ignore these spiritual attacks. My Bible is in English, thank you. That’s all I need.

Now where was I? Oh yes. The atheists, I apologize they’ve derailed me once again. But as a Christian, Bible verses are in my quiver and if I hit the target somewhere between the bullseye and the kidney, I trust that God’s Grace is going to cover any damage.

With atheists, a suggested tactic is to talk about money and the poor as little as possible. Run from the topic if you must, particularly if it starts getting uncomfortable. Always remember this friends; that anxious, unsettling “Wow, they might be right about this, we’re focusing almost all of our efforts on the gays and moral values instead of helping the vulnerable” is a feeling from the Evil One. An atheist will never convict you, God is God but even He is not big enough to teach you something about His character through someone who is not a team Jesus member.

Be wise. Remember that Jesus said that the poor will be with us always, and the way to interpret that is to just not worry about them, let them take care of themselves. The poor is our lowest priority. Accumulating our taxes and Money is the heart of our Christian ministry. But what we forget is how important it is to use as a tool of evangelism. Sure, we give our 10% (more or less), but what I learned is how we’re called to talk about it with others as we’re sharing the Gospel, particularly when they bring up what they don’t think we’re doing well.

I hope this helps.

Blessings – big fat juicy dollar sign ones!